It’s Monday and I feel like I have lived this day 1000 times before. I am used to having a beach to walk on, a city to explore, a boardwalk to stroll along with an ice-cream, a train or bus to catch, a variety of malls to choose from, a job, a million options… and you get the idea.
But here I am miles away from my home; Perth Australia. In an entirely different culture, without my family and friends, alone in a little apartment with my newborn baby Micah, in Collegedale Tennessee, which according to me is in the middle of nowhere!
I begin to feel discontent, frustrated, anxious, and irritated. What am I doing here? Surely God does not want me to spend my life staring at the four walls of my apartment while my husband achieves his goals. What about my goals? What is my purpose? And we don’t have any money, we barely have enough for food, for gas, and baby formula. I can’t even get clothes… It’s summer, and I am still wearing my maternity winter clothes! UGH!
After a week of discussing with my husband our options so we can both enjoy our lives and so I can have a purpose too, I give up trying to figure it all out. I decide to take a shower, where I break down in tears. I now know what it means to truly pour your heart out to God. I have never felt so helpless. I don’t want to take away my husbands dream of being at SAU, but I want to be able to enjoy my life too, and be the best wife and mum I can be. I ask God to at least take some of the burdens away of our situation like no money for food, for gas, the basic necessities in life. I also ask God to put a new desire within me to enjoy the place He has called us to go.
The next day is Sabbath morning. Micah gets dedicated. I am super excited to dedicate my son to Jesus. What a privilege! Unexpectedly I broke down in tears during the dedication. I was happy for my son, but unknown to everyone else, I was mostly crying from exhaustion and the frustration of the past week. At the end of the service, I am approached by a member of the church. She begins to tell me that she wants to adopt Marcos, Micah and myself as her family. She is now our 2nd mum, and Micah’s yaya (grandma). God had just blessed me with family that I don’t have in Tennessee. But that’s not all. She speaks of how she wants to make sure we never have an empty fridge or pantry again. So now I make a shopping list each Wednesday night for her, and she buys my groceries and provides us with gas money each week! We never have to worry about being without food, formula or gas. Praise God! He has provided once again! Just when I thought He was through, I notice my heart begins to change. I recognize my selfishness, and my discouraging countenance of the past. I now have peace, joy, and am filled with content. I realize my purpose. God didn’t just call Marcos to ministry. He has called me also. He has called me to be a help meet for my husband, and this I will gladly do for the rest of our lives.
